Scott shared this (very sad) story with me today, and it somehow resonated with me...perhaps because the way they describe Jami and Joe Kennedy's marriage mirrors ours, or maybe because I know that I can't do any of this pregnancy/childbirth/childraising without Scott's love and support.
Anyway, grab a box of tissues and read: http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/print?id=3313165&type=story
(By the way, still haven't called the doctor - their office is closed now, but I have an appointment on Monday anyway.)
March 28, 2008
March 26, 2008
31w - 9w to go!
Still no ultrasound pictures to update, but I have good reason. I can't walk the distance I need to in order to get to the scanner.
(Apologies in advance if this comes across as a really ranty post, but I am officially having my first "I want this baby out of me!" moment.)
The past week or so has necessitated a lot of walking, either via baby shopping or work events. This, combined with the fact that the baby is now head down and apparently resting just about as low as she can go, has started to cause me what is probably some of the worst pain I have ever felt.
Since about 12 weeks, I've had occasional pain in the region near what my nurse practitioner so cleverly refers to as the "baby chute". (I figure I can use that term if she can use it, right?) I find it gets worse if I've done a lot of walking, and ever since the baby has turned head-down, the pain has been worse than ever.
Well, this evening it turned into a "I can't walk" kind of pain. As in, I can stand up, but transferring weight from one leg to another pretty much brings me to tears. And it's not constant - it comes and goes (probably when the baby moves and takes pressure off of certain areas). But when it hurts, it is unbearable.
In fact, last night I was trying to go to sleep, and I sleep with a pillow between my knees to take the pressure off that area...but last night, I couldn't even lift my leg the inch and a half I needed to in order to move the pillow in there because every time I did, I literally felt like I was going to split in half. (And yes, by literally, I mean, literally...I felt like I was being ripped apart.)
Oh, and forget rolling over at night. Just forget it. I would rather lay there and be a little uncomfortable than move my legs in the way I need to in order to roll over.
So, tonight I did a little research via the Google School of Medical Science (haha) and determined that it must be: symphysis pubis dysfunction. The symptoms describe exactly what I'm feeling, perfectly.
Given that it's been so much worse the past few days, I'll be calling the doctor in the morning to find out if there's anything I can DO for it. I have an appointment on Monday, but I need to do something - anything. This is seriously impacting my exercise routine, which I need to keep my blood pressure down (especially given all the other stressors in my life right now, which are making my blood pressure go back up again).
In addition to that, I am now gaining weight at a rapid pace, despite the fact that I can't hardly eat a whole meal anymore, so I'm sure I'm going to get another weight-related lecture at the doctor's office. If I eat as much as I normally would (and sometimes even when I don't), I get the worst heartburn I've ever had. If I don't eat enough, I'm STARVING within an hour. I should buy stock in Tums at this point. If I don't get heartburn, I get nausea. But yeah, eating in and of itself is a chore these days.
Oh, and the baby has this lovely new habit of kicking me in the kidney, and I cannot express how painful that is. Every time it feels like I'm getting a kidney stone all over again, but the pain only lasts a minute and then goes away once she moves.
Annnnnndddd I am now reaching a point where none of my MATERNITY clothes fit. I went shopping with Stefanie last weekend and picked up a few shirts/tank tops, but even they're a little snug. And my maternity pants, which were once baggy on me, are now getting snug.
Actually, I think wearing my normal clothes may be one of the biggest things I'm looking forward to doing post-pregnancy.
Speaking of things that don't fit, I haven't been able to wear my engagement/wedding rings since Christmas because my hands are too puffy. And I miss them terribly.
To make matters worse, I am so tired all the time, but I can't sleep worth a damn anymore. I'm either uncomfortable, in pain, or have to pee...constantly. At least once the baby is here, I'll be able to squeeze in a couple hours of quality sleep between feedings. I'm not even getting QUALITY sleep at this point. I'm pretty much just dozing in and out of sleep. I must have seen every hour on the clock last night. I've tried going to sleep earlier. I've pretty much cut out all caffeine at this point (aside from the rare treat of coffee or soda, maybe once a week). At this point, I give up. I'm staying up until I can't stand it anymore and then maybe I'll REALLY sleep. (This is also making getting up in the morning a royal pain in the whatever, because between the lack of sleep and the fact that getting out of bed is painful, all I want to do is just lay there.)
Let me just say that with all of this going on, these next 8-9 weeks cannot move fast enough. It will be WEIRD to not feel her moving around in there anymore, but I will take it over all of this pain and discomfort and sleeplessness.
//end rant
I guess I'll end things on a positive note. I was laying on the sofa the other night, reading a magazine, and the baby started moving around. She's facing my left side, so I put my hand just below my ribcage, and I totally felt her little foot move across it. It was the first time I felt her move and was actually able to determine which body part I was feeling and it was so cool. I started giggling and couldn't stop, and she kept doing it for like 10 minutes.
I also felt part of my tummy get harder last night, like she was moving around and pressed up against it and poked it and felt what had to be the outline of a leg or foot...or maybe a spine? It was long and bony. And she did NOT like me poking at it because she quickly squirmed out of the way.
We also had a big meeting at work, with some music and people talking into microphones, and she definitely reacted to the sound, which was really cool. I know she's in there and can HEAR things now.
So, you take the bad with the good. But all these things really made me want her out so I can interact with her face to face! (But please, little one, stay in there until you're good and healthy and ready to come out!)
(Apologies in advance if this comes across as a really ranty post, but I am officially having my first "I want this baby out of me!" moment.)
The past week or so has necessitated a lot of walking, either via baby shopping or work events. This, combined with the fact that the baby is now head down and apparently resting just about as low as she can go, has started to cause me what is probably some of the worst pain I have ever felt.
Since about 12 weeks, I've had occasional pain in the region near what my nurse practitioner so cleverly refers to as the "baby chute". (I figure I can use that term if she can use it, right?) I find it gets worse if I've done a lot of walking, and ever since the baby has turned head-down, the pain has been worse than ever.
Well, this evening it turned into a "I can't walk" kind of pain. As in, I can stand up, but transferring weight from one leg to another pretty much brings me to tears. And it's not constant - it comes and goes (probably when the baby moves and takes pressure off of certain areas). But when it hurts, it is unbearable.
In fact, last night I was trying to go to sleep, and I sleep with a pillow between my knees to take the pressure off that area...but last night, I couldn't even lift my leg the inch and a half I needed to in order to move the pillow in there because every time I did, I literally felt like I was going to split in half. (And yes, by literally, I mean, literally...I felt like I was being ripped apart.)
Oh, and forget rolling over at night. Just forget it. I would rather lay there and be a little uncomfortable than move my legs in the way I need to in order to roll over.
So, tonight I did a little research via the Google School of Medical Science (haha) and determined that it must be: symphysis pubis dysfunction. The symptoms describe exactly what I'm feeling, perfectly.
Given that it's been so much worse the past few days, I'll be calling the doctor in the morning to find out if there's anything I can DO for it. I have an appointment on Monday, but I need to do something - anything. This is seriously impacting my exercise routine, which I need to keep my blood pressure down (especially given all the other stressors in my life right now, which are making my blood pressure go back up again).
In addition to that, I am now gaining weight at a rapid pace, despite the fact that I can't hardly eat a whole meal anymore, so I'm sure I'm going to get another weight-related lecture at the doctor's office. If I eat as much as I normally would (and sometimes even when I don't), I get the worst heartburn I've ever had. If I don't eat enough, I'm STARVING within an hour. I should buy stock in Tums at this point. If I don't get heartburn, I get nausea. But yeah, eating in and of itself is a chore these days.
Oh, and the baby has this lovely new habit of kicking me in the kidney, and I cannot express how painful that is. Every time it feels like I'm getting a kidney stone all over again, but the pain only lasts a minute and then goes away once she moves.
Annnnnndddd I am now reaching a point where none of my MATERNITY clothes fit. I went shopping with Stefanie last weekend and picked up a few shirts/tank tops, but even they're a little snug. And my maternity pants, which were once baggy on me, are now getting snug.
Actually, I think wearing my normal clothes may be one of the biggest things I'm looking forward to doing post-pregnancy.
Speaking of things that don't fit, I haven't been able to wear my engagement/wedding rings since Christmas because my hands are too puffy. And I miss them terribly.
To make matters worse, I am so tired all the time, but I can't sleep worth a damn anymore. I'm either uncomfortable, in pain, or have to pee...constantly. At least once the baby is here, I'll be able to squeeze in a couple hours of quality sleep between feedings. I'm not even getting QUALITY sleep at this point. I'm pretty much just dozing in and out of sleep. I must have seen every hour on the clock last night. I've tried going to sleep earlier. I've pretty much cut out all caffeine at this point (aside from the rare treat of coffee or soda, maybe once a week). At this point, I give up. I'm staying up until I can't stand it anymore and then maybe I'll REALLY sleep. (This is also making getting up in the morning a royal pain in the whatever, because between the lack of sleep and the fact that getting out of bed is painful, all I want to do is just lay there.)
Let me just say that with all of this going on, these next 8-9 weeks cannot move fast enough. It will be WEIRD to not feel her moving around in there anymore, but I will take it over all of this pain and discomfort and sleeplessness.
//end rant
I guess I'll end things on a positive note. I was laying on the sofa the other night, reading a magazine, and the baby started moving around. She's facing my left side, so I put my hand just below my ribcage, and I totally felt her little foot move across it. It was the first time I felt her move and was actually able to determine which body part I was feeling and it was so cool. I started giggling and couldn't stop, and she kept doing it for like 10 minutes.
I also felt part of my tummy get harder last night, like she was moving around and pressed up against it and poked it and felt what had to be the outline of a leg or foot...or maybe a spine? It was long and bony. And she did NOT like me poking at it because she quickly squirmed out of the way.
We also had a big meeting at work, with some music and people talking into microphones, and she definitely reacted to the sound, which was really cool. I know she's in there and can HEAR things now.
So, you take the bad with the good. But all these things really made me want her out so I can interact with her face to face! (But please, little one, stay in there until you're good and healthy and ready to come out!)
March 20, 2008
30w - 10w to go!
I got a bit of good news the other day that I wanted to share...I had been holding off on sharing this until a final decision was made, and I had notified my boss of my plans...but...
I NOW QUALIFY FOR SHORT TERM DISABILITY!
I had my annual benefits meeting on Monday. I hadn't been signed up for short term disability in the past (Actually, I THOUGHT I had been, but shortly after I found out I was pregnant, I learned that somehow my coverage had been canceled...probably accidentally when I canceled my health insurance when Scott & I got married) and I had been told that, being pregnant, I wouldn't be able to sign up for it and therefore wouldn't get paid for my maternity leave (beyond my vacation pay).
But, since my last qualifying date, the company changed disability insurance carriers, and since I had never had an opportunity to sign up for this particular plan in the past, they let me sign up for it! Which means I'm covered and will earn 60% of my pay during the time I'm out.
So, hurray! Angelica will have mommy and daddy home with her for almost four months, between my leave and Scott's!
I feel for my colleagues who have to cover for me while I'm out, though. I'll have to do my best to get them all adequately trained and then just be available by phone whenever necessary.
In other news, I did a little more research into the low amniotic fluid issue that the doctor mentioned yesterday. I was a little confused about a conversation between him and the nurse...he asked the nurse what the AFI was and she said 8, and he said he wasn't worried but that I should drink more fluids. According to Babycenter.com, AFI = amniotic fluid index, and is measured in centimeters. In the 3rd trimester, normal is between 5 and 25, and mine was only 8, so like I said before - normal, but low end of normal range.
I've been pounding back the water, though, and the baby LOVES that. There have been a couple of kicks today that were unlike anything I experienced. I was reading a magazine on the sofa earlier and the kick knocked the magazine right out of my hands! Crazy for a baby who isn't really that active!
I forgot to mention yesterday, too - her heart was good and strong at 157 beats per minute!
I still need to get those ultrasound photos scanned in. I forgot to bring my flash drive to work, and Scott wanted to take the photos to work tomorrow, so I'll have to take care of doing that later on. I can say, though, that there is one profile shot in the bunch that I am in LOVE with. She is so cute!
That's gonna be it for tonight...I feel another migraine coming on (sigh) so I'm going to go take a warm bath and try to get some rest.
I NOW QUALIFY FOR SHORT TERM DISABILITY!
I had my annual benefits meeting on Monday. I hadn't been signed up for short term disability in the past (Actually, I THOUGHT I had been, but shortly after I found out I was pregnant, I learned that somehow my coverage had been canceled...probably accidentally when I canceled my health insurance when Scott & I got married) and I had been told that, being pregnant, I wouldn't be able to sign up for it and therefore wouldn't get paid for my maternity leave (beyond my vacation pay).
But, since my last qualifying date, the company changed disability insurance carriers, and since I had never had an opportunity to sign up for this particular plan in the past, they let me sign up for it! Which means I'm covered and will earn 60% of my pay during the time I'm out.
So, hurray! Angelica will have mommy and daddy home with her for almost four months, between my leave and Scott's!
I feel for my colleagues who have to cover for me while I'm out, though. I'll have to do my best to get them all adequately trained and then just be available by phone whenever necessary.
In other news, I did a little more research into the low amniotic fluid issue that the doctor mentioned yesterday. I was a little confused about a conversation between him and the nurse...he asked the nurse what the AFI was and she said 8, and he said he wasn't worried but that I should drink more fluids. According to Babycenter.com, AFI = amniotic fluid index, and is measured in centimeters. In the 3rd trimester, normal is between 5 and 25, and mine was only 8, so like I said before - normal, but low end of normal range.
I've been pounding back the water, though, and the baby LOVES that. There have been a couple of kicks today that were unlike anything I experienced. I was reading a magazine on the sofa earlier and the kick knocked the magazine right out of my hands! Crazy for a baby who isn't really that active!
I forgot to mention yesterday, too - her heart was good and strong at 157 beats per minute!
I still need to get those ultrasound photos scanned in. I forgot to bring my flash drive to work, and Scott wanted to take the photos to work tomorrow, so I'll have to take care of doing that later on. I can say, though, that there is one profile shot in the bunch that I am in LOVE with. She is so cute!
That's gonna be it for tonight...I feel another migraine coming on (sigh) so I'm going to go take a warm bath and try to get some rest.
March 19, 2008
29w6d - 10w1d to go!
We had another fun appointment with Dr. Fuentes today!
Not that it's fun to have to go see a perinatologist, but, we get an ultrasound at every visit, so I can't complain! I will have to bring my flash drive to work with me tomorrow so I can scan the new pictures in and upload them to the blog.
Angelica still looks fantastic. We got an excellent straight-on face shot, she's got these cute chubby cheeks and has really filled out. We got a couple profile shots, too - she is definitely her father's daughter! Her profile looks just like his. We also got another confirmation that she is, in fact, a girl. No surprises there (though she was much more modest this time than the last time - the tech, Maria, had to really work to get her to open up so we could get a peek!)
More good news - she is head down! This very likely explains why my pelvic bone has felt severely bruised over the past few days. Maria said that she will likely stay head down at this point, so this is good news! She just needs to fatten up a little more, and she'll be ready to go!
Speaking of fattening up - at our appointment 4 weeks ago, she was 1 pound, 13 ounces. Today she weighed in at 3 pounds, 6 ounces! My baby girl is getting so big! She also got the hiccups while we were looking at her on screen, and you could see her little tummy jump (and I could feel it too!)
Now, for the reason for the appointment - my blood pressure. At my last appointment at Dr. Fuentes office, it was 150/88. Today it was 130/66! He is no longer concerned about my blood pressure and told me to keep up what I've been doing.
The only other cause for concern, though ever so slight, is that the amniotic fluid is a tiny bit low. He wasn't worried about it (apparently it was at the low end of normal) and just told me to make sure I drink more water.
So, there are now two more appointments on the horizon - I see Dr. Cascio (one of the doctors in Dr. Wilson's practice) on the 31st of this month, and then back to Dr. Fuentes on the 16th of April. Beyond that, I think I'll be at Dr. Wilson's office every week to get checked for labor!
I can't believe she's almost here! 71 days to go!
Not that it's fun to have to go see a perinatologist, but, we get an ultrasound at every visit, so I can't complain! I will have to bring my flash drive to work with me tomorrow so I can scan the new pictures in and upload them to the blog.
Angelica still looks fantastic. We got an excellent straight-on face shot, she's got these cute chubby cheeks and has really filled out. We got a couple profile shots, too - she is definitely her father's daughter! Her profile looks just like his. We also got another confirmation that she is, in fact, a girl. No surprises there (though she was much more modest this time than the last time - the tech, Maria, had to really work to get her to open up so we could get a peek!)
More good news - she is head down! This very likely explains why my pelvic bone has felt severely bruised over the past few days. Maria said that she will likely stay head down at this point, so this is good news! She just needs to fatten up a little more, and she'll be ready to go!
Speaking of fattening up - at our appointment 4 weeks ago, she was 1 pound, 13 ounces. Today she weighed in at 3 pounds, 6 ounces! My baby girl is getting so big! She also got the hiccups while we were looking at her on screen, and you could see her little tummy jump (and I could feel it too!)
Now, for the reason for the appointment - my blood pressure. At my last appointment at Dr. Fuentes office, it was 150/88. Today it was 130/66! He is no longer concerned about my blood pressure and told me to keep up what I've been doing.
The only other cause for concern, though ever so slight, is that the amniotic fluid is a tiny bit low. He wasn't worried about it (apparently it was at the low end of normal) and just told me to make sure I drink more water.
So, there are now two more appointments on the horizon - I see Dr. Cascio (one of the doctors in Dr. Wilson's practice) on the 31st of this month, and then back to Dr. Fuentes on the 16th of April. Beyond that, I think I'll be at Dr. Wilson's office every week to get checked for labor!
I can't believe she's almost here! 71 days to go!
March 14, 2008
29w2d - 10w5d to go!
I've been having some minor braxton-hicks contractions for the past few weeks. They mainly come if I've been moving around a lot, but go away when I slow down/rest.
Last night, though, Scott and I were relaxing on the couch, watching Don't Forget the Lyrics, and Angelica decided she was going to be super active. Scott was resting his head against my belly, and she kicked him several times. (Angelica is not a super active baby, but during the brief periods she gets kicking, she REALLY gets kicking...even her kicks are painful when she really gets going!)
Well, I guess all her activity got the BH contractions really going - I only had two or three of them, but wow, they were intense. Enough to the point where I was in so much pain that I was questioning whether or not I would be able to handle the natural birth process!
I definitely do not plan to go back on my wishes for a natural birth...in spite of the pain (which I'm sure gets MUCH worse during true labor!) I still feel so strongly about avoiding medication. But wow. If that was any taste of what I am getting into, I am so not looking forward to labor and delivery!
Dear Angelica,
You've made this pregnancy SO incredibly easy, and for that, I am so grateful. Could you please do the same for the labor and delivery? The pain is okay, but can you make it quick? Thanks, and remember that mom and dad love you and we can't wait to meet you!
Love,
Mom
Last night, though, Scott and I were relaxing on the couch, watching Don't Forget the Lyrics, and Angelica decided she was going to be super active. Scott was resting his head against my belly, and she kicked him several times. (Angelica is not a super active baby, but during the brief periods she gets kicking, she REALLY gets kicking...even her kicks are painful when she really gets going!)
Well, I guess all her activity got the BH contractions really going - I only had two or three of them, but wow, they were intense. Enough to the point where I was in so much pain that I was questioning whether or not I would be able to handle the natural birth process!
I definitely do not plan to go back on my wishes for a natural birth...in spite of the pain (which I'm sure gets MUCH worse during true labor!) I still feel so strongly about avoiding medication. But wow. If that was any taste of what I am getting into, I am so not looking forward to labor and delivery!
Dear Angelica,
You've made this pregnancy SO incredibly easy, and for that, I am so grateful. Could you please do the same for the labor and delivery? The pain is okay, but can you make it quick? Thanks, and remember that mom and dad love you and we can't wait to meet you!
Love,
Mom
March 12, 2008
29w - 11w to go!
I just got good news from the other pregnant lady in my life!
Scott and I are getting a niece! My sister's having a girl - Anna Elizabeth will be her name (aww, Annabeth...how incredibly cute AND classic at the same time!) Our little girl's best friend will be born about six weeks after she comes!
And they'll both have big brother/cousin Willy to beat up any evil boyfriends!
Other than that, life in prego-land is going well. I haven't blogged in awhile because it's been a busy few weeks at work, and this last trimester is already kicking my ass. I am SO exhausted all the time now.
In good news, though, my blood pressure has almost stabilized. Over the weekend it was right around 120/70 both days, and it's gone back up slightly since Monday (stress related, I'm sure)...today's was 130/80...but when I was getting numbers like 150/89 three weeks ago, I can definitely say I've made progress!
Now that the 3rd trimester is officially here - I should write another list of things I learned like I did after the 1st trimester. I'll have to do that later on.
This part of this blog post will be called "Just call me Homer Simpson":
The past two weeks I've had what I consider to be my first true pregnancy craving. It seems that I can't walk past a doughnut without eating it. If I see them in the store, I have to buy one. If I think about one, I have to stop and get one. (Like right now! I really want a doughnut because I'm thinking about it!) I stopped at the gas station by our apartment on Monday evening (at 6 p.m.!) to buy a doughnut because I just couldn't get it off of my mind. It's sick. I don't even really LIKE doughnuts!
I also contemplated getting rid of all my clothes for the rest of this pregnancy and just wearing a mu-mu (like Homer, in the episode of the Simpsons where he gets really fat in order to be allowed to work from home). For real. Either the baby had a huge growth spurt in the past few weeks, or all of my clothes mysteriously shrank in the wash. I have enough that still fit to get me through the work week, thankfully...but I find myself having to do a load of laundry mid-week for pants and other necessities. And I refuse to buy more maternity clothes at this point. I'll only get to wear them for two months, and never again...totally not worth the expense.
On that note, I'm off to buy a doughnut. (Just kidding! Or am I...?)
Scott and I are getting a niece! My sister's having a girl - Anna Elizabeth will be her name (aww, Annabeth...how incredibly cute AND classic at the same time!) Our little girl's best friend will be born about six weeks after she comes!
And they'll both have big brother/cousin Willy to beat up any evil boyfriends!
Other than that, life in prego-land is going well. I haven't blogged in awhile because it's been a busy few weeks at work, and this last trimester is already kicking my ass. I am SO exhausted all the time now.
In good news, though, my blood pressure has almost stabilized. Over the weekend it was right around 120/70 both days, and it's gone back up slightly since Monday (stress related, I'm sure)...today's was 130/80...but when I was getting numbers like 150/89 three weeks ago, I can definitely say I've made progress!
Now that the 3rd trimester is officially here - I should write another list of things I learned like I did after the 1st trimester. I'll have to do that later on.
This part of this blog post will be called "Just call me Homer Simpson":
The past two weeks I've had what I consider to be my first true pregnancy craving. It seems that I can't walk past a doughnut without eating it. If I see them in the store, I have to buy one. If I think about one, I have to stop and get one. (Like right now! I really want a doughnut because I'm thinking about it!) I stopped at the gas station by our apartment on Monday evening (at 6 p.m.!) to buy a doughnut because I just couldn't get it off of my mind. It's sick. I don't even really LIKE doughnuts!
I also contemplated getting rid of all my clothes for the rest of this pregnancy and just wearing a mu-mu (like Homer, in the episode of the Simpsons where he gets really fat in order to be allowed to work from home). For real. Either the baby had a huge growth spurt in the past few weeks, or all of my clothes mysteriously shrank in the wash. I have enough that still fit to get me through the work week, thankfully...but I find myself having to do a load of laundry mid-week for pants and other necessities. And I refuse to buy more maternity clothes at this point. I'll only get to wear them for two months, and never again...totally not worth the expense.
On that note, I'm off to buy a doughnut. (Just kidding! Or am I...?)
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