Last night, Angelica and I had to make a quick trip to Target after work/daycare, mainly to pick up a new pair of shoes for her because the sandals she's been wearing would no longer stay on her feet.
So, we run into Target and to keep her busy, I stop at the food court in the front and buy a soft pretzel (plain and unsalted) and fruit punch for us to share (sugary, yes, but she only has it on occassion). We walk through the store, buy her new shoes, and a few other necessities, and leave.
In the parking lot, as I get her out of the shopping cart, she drops her last piece of pretzel in the parking lot next to the car. I push the shopping cart back into the corral (right next to my car) and as we're coming back to the car door, a black bird lands next to us and starts chirping at the pretzel piece.
This fascinated Angelica. She kept chirping back at the bird, and saying "Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi" over and over again to it. And the bird, mesmerized by the food, didn't fly away. So we stood there, in the parking lot, watching the bird (and making funny noises at it, and giggling).
In that moment it hit me that I wasn't rushing to do something. I wasn't headed out the door to work or off to an appointment or rushing though an errand or working hard to meet a school deadline or anything else. She and I were both just standing there, taking in the moment, enjoying each other's company, and it was wonderful.
I think we should all find a way each day to stop and watch the birds, to enjoy each other's company, and to take a deep breath, relax, and gather our thoughts in these crazy, hectic lives we lead.
June 25, 2009
June 22, 2009
Jon and Kate Plus 8 Announcement - Divorce
Viewers across the nation are anticipating and trying to come up with theories about the big Jon and Kate Plus 8 announcement, airing tonight.
As someone who publicly blogs about my family, I've had to weigh the pros and cons of what I make public. I haven't made these decisions casually.
So, when I think about the TV drama that Jon and Kate Plus 8 has become, I feel uneasy. What was once a cute show about a unique family going through the trials and tribulations of raising eight children (six of which are toddlers) has become a real live train wreck. With that, a lot of things that I, as a parent, would never personally want broadcast to the nation, have become fodder for public conversation. Even SuperScott, who has never watched the show, knows what's going on.
To be honest, I have never been a fan of the show. I watched it while I was pregnant and on maternity leave but Kate always drove me a little bit crazy with how bossy and demanding she was. (Though I know, with 8 kids, what else are you going to do?) But my heart breaks for these kids, whose family is, as the commercial says, at a crossroads. Whatever the outcome is, the situation itself, and the publicity surrounding it, is bound to have an impact on their lives. The adults have a choice in the matter, but these kids are just along for the ride.
So, we'll see tonight what happens. I hope, though, that this once very cute show doesn't turn into a sad story of a marriage ending.
[Edit] And so it was revealed. Jon and Kate have filed for divorce. After the previews and the little bits and pieces of conversation sprinked throughout the episode, it wasn't surprising to hear that revealed. All controversy aside - the show's popularity, its impact on the family, the kids, and so on - it is still sad that their marriage fell apart, for whatever reason it did.
We the public will never know the true story - leave it up to the television networks and magazines to edit the videos to give it the spin they want to portray. Regardless, we can still take away some lessons from this and apply them to our own marriages. My takeaway from it was: Stand up for yourself in the relationship, but don't be bossy - and above all else, show some love and appreciation for your spouse.
As someone who publicly blogs about my family, I've had to weigh the pros and cons of what I make public. I haven't made these decisions casually.
So, when I think about the TV drama that Jon and Kate Plus 8 has become, I feel uneasy. What was once a cute show about a unique family going through the trials and tribulations of raising eight children (six of which are toddlers) has become a real live train wreck. With that, a lot of things that I, as a parent, would never personally want broadcast to the nation, have become fodder for public conversation. Even SuperScott, who has never watched the show, knows what's going on.
To be honest, I have never been a fan of the show. I watched it while I was pregnant and on maternity leave but Kate always drove me a little bit crazy with how bossy and demanding she was. (Though I know, with 8 kids, what else are you going to do?) But my heart breaks for these kids, whose family is, as the commercial says, at a crossroads. Whatever the outcome is, the situation itself, and the publicity surrounding it, is bound to have an impact on their lives. The adults have a choice in the matter, but these kids are just along for the ride.
So, we'll see tonight what happens. I hope, though, that this once very cute show doesn't turn into a sad story of a marriage ending.
[Edit] And so it was revealed. Jon and Kate have filed for divorce. After the previews and the little bits and pieces of conversation sprinked throughout the episode, it wasn't surprising to hear that revealed. All controversy aside - the show's popularity, its impact on the family, the kids, and so on - it is still sad that their marriage fell apart, for whatever reason it did.
We the public will never know the true story - leave it up to the television networks and magazines to edit the videos to give it the spin they want to portray. Regardless, we can still take away some lessons from this and apply them to our own marriages. My takeaway from it was: Stand up for yourself in the relationship, but don't be bossy - and above all else, show some love and appreciation for your spouse.
June 17, 2009
I'm Not Part of the Cupcake Police Squad
As crazy and hectic as my mornings are, I don't often catch Good Morning America in the morning. I do sometimes read their articles, and this morning, I read this article about a mom on a crusade against junk food that threw me for a loop.
To provide a loose summary for those as busy as I am -- this mom is so adamant that her children not be served junk food that she has them collect any food served that's not on the school menu in a Tupperware and bring it home to discuss. She has bad-mouthed overweight celebrities, used foul language at PTA meetings, stopped by police while protesting an ice cream display at the gym, and even been asked to move away by other parents for her outspoken stance against junk food. Finally, she thinks that parents should be given permission slips to sign in order for their children to be served treats at special events.
As a parent, I feel strongly about teaching moderation to my child because I want her to be healthy, but I think it's just as unhealthy to go the opposite direction and make a huge issue out of food. Do I think she should eat cake and candy daily? Of course not. But do I think she should have to package up a cupcake given to her at a special event at school and bring it home to discuss whether or not to eat it? Absolutely not. I think that sets up unhealthy and unrealistic expectations about food.
As a mother to a daughter, I also think that this is an extremely unhealthy example to set for a young girl. In a society where women are flashed images of skinny models and actresses and society conveys the message that it's more important to be thin than smart, to reinforce this by analyzing every bit of food she eats sets her up for a potentially dangerous cycle.
I think this mom may have her own issues surrounding food and she's projecting them on to her children. The article says that she doesn't eat breakfast or lunch and squeezes meals in between workouts to avoid gaining any weight.
In helping our children eat healthy, I think we need to look at the bigger picture. We need to make the issue about health, not about food. Serve healthy, nutritious meals and encourage them to go outside and play. Teach them about how food is fuel for the body, and how we need vitamins to grow, carbohydrates for energy, that our muscles need protein and our bones need calcium. In my opinion, this, and setting a good example through the meals you prepare and your own eating and exercise habits, is the real way to combat childhood obesity.
But also tell them that, once in awhile, when you're at a birthday party, for example, that it is okay to have a piece of cake. But not five pieces, and not every day.
To provide a loose summary for those as busy as I am -- this mom is so adamant that her children not be served junk food that she has them collect any food served that's not on the school menu in a Tupperware and bring it home to discuss. She has bad-mouthed overweight celebrities, used foul language at PTA meetings, stopped by police while protesting an ice cream display at the gym, and even been asked to move away by other parents for her outspoken stance against junk food. Finally, she thinks that parents should be given permission slips to sign in order for their children to be served treats at special events.
As a parent, I feel strongly about teaching moderation to my child because I want her to be healthy, but I think it's just as unhealthy to go the opposite direction and make a huge issue out of food. Do I think she should eat cake and candy daily? Of course not. But do I think she should have to package up a cupcake given to her at a special event at school and bring it home to discuss whether or not to eat it? Absolutely not. I think that sets up unhealthy and unrealistic expectations about food.
As a mother to a daughter, I also think that this is an extremely unhealthy example to set for a young girl. In a society where women are flashed images of skinny models and actresses and society conveys the message that it's more important to be thin than smart, to reinforce this by analyzing every bit of food she eats sets her up for a potentially dangerous cycle.
I think this mom may have her own issues surrounding food and she's projecting them on to her children. The article says that she doesn't eat breakfast or lunch and squeezes meals in between workouts to avoid gaining any weight.
In helping our children eat healthy, I think we need to look at the bigger picture. We need to make the issue about health, not about food. Serve healthy, nutritious meals and encourage them to go outside and play. Teach them about how food is fuel for the body, and how we need vitamins to grow, carbohydrates for energy, that our muscles need protein and our bones need calcium. In my opinion, this, and setting a good example through the meals you prepare and your own eating and exercise habits, is the real way to combat childhood obesity.
But also tell them that, once in awhile, when you're at a birthday party, for example, that it is okay to have a piece of cake. But not five pieces, and not every day.
June 16, 2009
Tuesday Timesavers: Five Ways To Shorten Your Morning Routine
Welcome to this week’s edition of Tuesday Timesavers – helping moms like you save time each week! This week, I'll be talking about the thing that is my biggest challenge as a working mom: the morning routine.
Here is how my mornings have been going as of late. Angelica wakes up at 7 or 7:30. SuperScott and I will roll out of bed - one of us will get ready for work while the other one feeds, dresses, and gets her ready to go to daycare. Lately, he's been the one handling getting her ready and fed, while I get ready for work. I've been finding that my current process takes way, way too much time. Over the past week, I've been examining what I do each morning in order to come up with some ideas on how to save time and get out the door.
So, here are my suggestions.
- Shower at night. This saves 15 minutes off of the morning routine (20 if you blow dry your hair), and has the added benefit of keeping your pillowcase clean of the germs that collect in your hair over the course of the day. (I realize not all women wash their hair daily -- I do, though, probably because I'm a bit of a germ freak.)
- Cut back on cosmetics. My morning makeup routine takes less than five minutes. This is probably the shortest part of the process. I use liquid-to-powder foundation (Cover Girl's Aquasmooth is a good one - good coverage but not heavy), lipstick, eye shadow, mascara and eyebrow pencil. Getting to skip the eye liner, and using the combined foundation/powder cuts out 3-5 minutes from the makeup routine.
- Pack the night before. One thing I used to do, and need to get back to doing again, is packing a large bag with everything I need for the following day. Any paperwork I needed to bring with me, nonperishable lunch items (I would grab a frozen meal from the freezer in the morning), and anything that needed to go to daycare (diapers/wipes/clothes) went in the bag the night before. Also, when Angelica was still on the bottle (we're off it now!) we would prepare her bottles the night before and leave them in the fridge in a cooler bag, which I would grab when I grabbed my frozen meal in the morning. This saves a variable amount of time, depending on how organized your chaos is first thing in the morning.
- Eat a quick breakfast. I don't cook in the morning -- ever. Breakfast is either a Lean Cuisine breakfast pocket (A minute and a half in the microwave) or a bowl of cereal, with juice or coffee. This is a lot quicker than making eggs and toast or anything else that requires preparation in the morning. This saves 5-10 minutes of cooking time.
- Time your coffee. Last but not least -- my coffee maker has a timer on it. I prepare it the night before and set the time for 7:00 a.m. (remember, Angelica wakes up at 7 or 7:30) so by the time we're ready to sit down for breakfast, the coffee is already made. That means no setting up the pot to brew in the morning and no waiting for the coffee to be ready. It practically makes itself. This probably saves another 5-10 minutes of preparation and waiting.
This is by no means an exhaustive list. Got any ideas for saving time in the morning? Feel free to comment and let me know - I know I'd appreciate it and I bet other moms will too!
June 13, 2009
Petition to End Working Mom Guilt
I've read a lot of mommy blogs lately about the guilt surrounding being a working mom. Having been there myself when I first returned to work after Angelica was born, I understand why it happens. You return to work, people ask you why, they ask you how you can stand leaving your child to be "raised by someone else" (ugh), why doesn't your husband earn enough that you can stay home, or worst of all, why are you so selfish that you want to return to work (yes, selfish for wanting to provide for your family).
I say - enough! I say we end this guilt! We as moms (and face it, even stay at home moms are still truly working moms at heart) get enough criticism and ridicule regardless of our parenting choices. I refuse to continue feeling guilty for being a working mom - a "choice" that I felt was best for both me and my family. (I place choice in quotations because in many cases, it's not a choice, it's a necessity.)
Besides, would anyone say these things to a father who "chose" to return to work? (I'm sure that men get even more flack for being "stay at home dads" than men who "choose" to return to work).
Anyone else with me?
I say - enough! I say we end this guilt! We as moms (and face it, even stay at home moms are still truly working moms at heart) get enough criticism and ridicule regardless of our parenting choices. I refuse to continue feeling guilty for being a working mom - a "choice" that I felt was best for both me and my family. (I place choice in quotations because in many cases, it's not a choice, it's a necessity.)
Besides, would anyone say these things to a father who "chose" to return to work? (I'm sure that men get even more flack for being "stay at home dads" than men who "choose" to return to work).
Anyone else with me?
June 12, 2009
Top 10 Reasons Why Real Life Deliveries Are Nothing Like A Baby Story
From my own personal experience - yours may be different, comment and share yours!
Bonus: Word of caution to the wise, c-section mamas - they do put up that blue screen so you can't see what's going on, but if you don't want to see the gore, be sure the nurse standing next to you doesn't have glasses.
- Your whole pregnancy, labor, delivery and hospital discharge are not condensed into one neatly edited hour.
- Despite your best efforts, your labor and delivery will not go exactly like you planned and described in your birth plan.
- Makeup and jewelry? Who wears makeup and jewelry when they're in labor?
- Not all labor and delivery nurses are super nice. Some are actually quite snarky.
- Your well-intentioned husband/significant other will say/do something boneheaded.
- Forget modesty. Hospital gowns? No thank you!
- Doctors/nurses don't always explain what they're doing. Also: if you ask, they will look at you like you're a crazy lady for asking.
- You don't ask for an epidural and get it immediately. It may only take 20 minutes for the anesthesiologist to arrive, but it will feel like two hours years.
- If you have a c-section, your doctor won't be explaining each step of the procedure. (Mine was too busy discussing his seven year old's grades with his assistant.)
- Last, but certainly not least: After going home, nobody looks that good with a three day/week old baby.
Bonus: Word of caution to the wise, c-section mamas - they do put up that blue screen so you can't see what's going on, but if you don't want to see the gore, be sure the nurse standing next to you doesn't have glasses.
June 10, 2009
Operation Lose the Baby Weight: Month 1 Results
So the other day, I preemptively stated that I lost nine pounds.
Well, due to a combination of being sick last week, recovering, recovering the appetite I had lost during the time I was sick, and hormones galore (ladies, you know what I mean), I stepped on the scale this morning for the official weekly weigh in...
And I had gained back two pounds.
Arrrrrghhh!
After a month of being on Weight Watchers, I'm still lucky enough to report a weight loss of seven pounds though! That's just under two pounds a week if I'm not mistaken. I'll take it!
I'm realizing that I need to get a game plan going for the next month. I need to carve out a routine for exercise, I need to be more diligent about watching what I eat. So, for the next 30 days, that's my goal. I'm excited to see where that lands me in another month!
Well, due to a combination of being sick last week, recovering, recovering the appetite I had lost during the time I was sick, and hormones galore (ladies, you know what I mean), I stepped on the scale this morning for the official weekly weigh in...
And I had gained back two pounds.
Arrrrrghhh!
After a month of being on Weight Watchers, I'm still lucky enough to report a weight loss of seven pounds though! That's just under two pounds a week if I'm not mistaken. I'll take it!
I'm realizing that I need to get a game plan going for the next month. I need to carve out a routine for exercise, I need to be more diligent about watching what I eat. So, for the next 30 days, that's my goal. I'm excited to see where that lands me in another month!
June 9, 2009
Tuesday Timesavers: Lose the Baby Weight With Weight Watchers Online
Welcome to this week's edition of Tuesday Timesavers - helping moms like you save time each week! Disclaimer: I am not compensated for this product review, so the below is entirely my opinion.
First of all, apologies for the hiatus - as you can see, the site recently got a facelift, and most of my time was devoted to that. But never fear, Tuesday Timesavers is here again!
This week's edition of Tuesday Timesavers will be about Weight Watchers Online! If you've read my post about my quest to lose the baby weight you'll know that I've now been on the program for a month. To give a little preview of the weight loss I should be announcing once the month is up (later this week!) - I am down nine pounds! (And I didn't even abide by the plan perfectly 100% of the time!)
I'm sure many of you are familiar with Weight Watchers. I joined for the first time when I was planning my wedding back in 2004/2005, and again after the wedding. I wanted to sign up after having the baby, but when you're a working mom, when do you have time for meetings?
So I gave Weight Watchers online a shot, and was wary about whether or not it would work since there isn't the accountability of meetings. I didn't find that as a factor in my success though, because I was motivated.
The best thing about the new version of the Weight Watchers program is that it's got an option that is practically designed for busy people like us. They have the Simply Filling technique, which gives you a list of foods and guidelines, and as long as you don't break the rules and you make sure to get your Good Health Guidelines checked off (water, vitamin, exercise, etc), you don't really need to "track" anything. So, between not having to attend a meeting, and not having to track your calories, it's a definite time saver! (Plus the meal choices and recipes are quick to make!)
So, all in all, it works well for moms who need a quick way to plan healthy meals. Whether you decide to track Points or use the Simply Filling technique, you're guided toward making good choices that are good for your wallet, waistline, and your time.
June 8, 2009
The Tale of the Lost Lovey
Our family is preparing for a monumental task: moving with a toddler.
Granted, this move will be small. We live in an apartment (two bedroom) and we're moving into the unit across the hall (three bedroom). When we moved into the apartment we now call home three years ago (moving from a one bedroom), it was just the two of us, and we grappled with the idea of what to do with our new space!
Now that we're a family of three, two bedrooms feels cramped. So later this month, we will make the move.
As I mentioned in my post about bath time with a toddler, my little girl is smart enough to help me with basic tasks. So over the weekend, I asked her to help me pick up a mountain of stuffed animals and put them in a bin (which is ultimately going to be donated to charity - we kept the important ones). And so she did!
Later that night, as we're preparing for bed, SuperScott says to me, "Where's lovey?" I looked in the crib, I looked in the living room, I looked in our bedroom, I looked everywhere for her lovey and it was nowhere to be found. When she realized that she was going to have to go to bed with a substitute lovey, she cried the biggest tears I have ever seen in my life. (And fortunately was still able to fall asleep!)
After we put her down, SuperScott and I turned our apartment upside down trying to find this thing, when it occurred to me to dig through the donation box.
And there it was. Halfway through pulling everything out of the box, there it was. While helping, she had put her own lovey in the box. It is a stuffed animal after all, right? I'm sure it made perfect sense to her.
We both breathed a sigh of relief.
Word to the wise: when your child is attached to an object, buy two! Or three! Or more! Fortunately for us, had this one gone missing for good, we have an identical one that she leaves at daycare. The company that makes her lovey bear stopped making it when she was a few months old, so I grabbed an extra from the clearance rack and I am so thankful we did.
Granted, this move will be small. We live in an apartment (two bedroom) and we're moving into the unit across the hall (three bedroom). When we moved into the apartment we now call home three years ago (moving from a one bedroom), it was just the two of us, and we grappled with the idea of what to do with our new space!
Now that we're a family of three, two bedrooms feels cramped. So later this month, we will make the move.
As I mentioned in my post about bath time with a toddler, my little girl is smart enough to help me with basic tasks. So over the weekend, I asked her to help me pick up a mountain of stuffed animals and put them in a bin (which is ultimately going to be donated to charity - we kept the important ones). And so she did!
Later that night, as we're preparing for bed, SuperScott says to me, "Where's lovey?" I looked in the crib, I looked in the living room, I looked in our bedroom, I looked everywhere for her lovey and it was nowhere to be found. When she realized that she was going to have to go to bed with a substitute lovey, she cried the biggest tears I have ever seen in my life. (And fortunately was still able to fall asleep!)
After we put her down, SuperScott and I turned our apartment upside down trying to find this thing, when it occurred to me to dig through the donation box.
And there it was. Halfway through pulling everything out of the box, there it was. While helping, she had put her own lovey in the box. It is a stuffed animal after all, right? I'm sure it made perfect sense to her.
We both breathed a sigh of relief.
Word to the wise: when your child is attached to an object, buy two! Or three! Or more! Fortunately for us, had this one gone missing for good, we have an identical one that she leaves at daycare. The company that makes her lovey bear stopped making it when she was a few months old, so I grabbed an extra from the clearance rack and I am so thankful we did.
June 4, 2009
Once upon a time I had a baby...
[caption id="attachment_152" align="alignleft" width="215" caption="Angelica at 1 week old"]
[/caption]
...and now that baby is a toddler.
Miss Angelica hit the one year mark last week. When people tell you that it happens fast, it really does happen fast. When I look at her face, I don't see the baby I brought home anymore.
This first year has been the most difficult, challenging, life-changing, personality-changing, educational, exhausting, wonderful, rewarding, exhilirating, frightening and best year of my life. I'm sad that it's over, and now that it is over, I'd do it all over again. (You first time, brand new parents out there reading this are probably thinking, "Are you crazy?! Why would anyone want to do it all over again!" How do I know this? Because I thought the same exact thing for the first six weeks of my daughter's life too.)
[caption id="attachment_151" align="alignright" width="203" caption="Angelica is 1 year old! "]
[/caption]
And here we are a year later. Amazing the changes that a year brings. She's gone from being the helpless, screaming, constantly eating, relentless poop factory to being a cute, cuddly, independent, walking, running, falling, laughing, too-smart-for-her-own-good, finicky-eating toddler (who yes, still occasionally earns the poop factory title).
So which is better? The answer is really both. Sometimes I miss the newness of her, the getting to know each other, the getting to know myself as a mom...but I don't miss the lack of sleep, constant worry about SIDS, the bottles, the cleaning of bottles, and the pumping of milk (and formula preparation). I've loved watching her grow and seeing her personality develop. She's got quite a character. When I look at her now, I just see a kid growing up and figuring herself out rather than a baby who can't even figure out how to get her thumb into her mouth. (Soon enough we'll have to work on keeping the thumb out of the mouth!)
In looking back on this past year, I think the biggest advice I could offer to new moms is - ditch the books and read your baby. They'll tell you what's best. Don't listen to criticism from other moms - so what if you use disposables/cloth, organic or not, pacifiers or not, cry it out or not. Love your baby, listen to your baby, and do what is right for your baby - not what's right for someone else's, or what some book tells you is best.
Oh, and hug your husband/significant other/person who is helping you out, too.
[/caption]...and now that baby is a toddler.
Miss Angelica hit the one year mark last week. When people tell you that it happens fast, it really does happen fast. When I look at her face, I don't see the baby I brought home anymore.
This first year has been the most difficult, challenging, life-changing, personality-changing, educational, exhausting, wonderful, rewarding, exhilirating, frightening and best year of my life. I'm sad that it's over, and now that it is over, I'd do it all over again. (You first time, brand new parents out there reading this are probably thinking, "Are you crazy?! Why would anyone want to do it all over again!" How do I know this? Because I thought the same exact thing for the first six weeks of my daughter's life too.)
[caption id="attachment_151" align="alignright" width="203" caption="Angelica is 1 year old! "]
[/caption]And here we are a year later. Amazing the changes that a year brings. She's gone from being the helpless, screaming, constantly eating, relentless poop factory to being a cute, cuddly, independent, walking, running, falling, laughing, too-smart-for-her-own-good, finicky-eating toddler (who yes, still occasionally earns the poop factory title).
So which is better? The answer is really both. Sometimes I miss the newness of her, the getting to know each other, the getting to know myself as a mom...but I don't miss the lack of sleep, constant worry about SIDS, the bottles, the cleaning of bottles, and the pumping of milk (and formula preparation). I've loved watching her grow and seeing her personality develop. She's got quite a character. When I look at her now, I just see a kid growing up and figuring herself out rather than a baby who can't even figure out how to get her thumb into her mouth. (Soon enough we'll have to work on keeping the thumb out of the mouth!)
In looking back on this past year, I think the biggest advice I could offer to new moms is - ditch the books and read your baby. They'll tell you what's best. Don't listen to criticism from other moms - so what if you use disposables/cloth, organic or not, pacifiers or not, cry it out or not. Love your baby, listen to your baby, and do what is right for your baby - not what's right for someone else's, or what some book tells you is best.
Oh, and hug your husband/significant other/person who is helping you out, too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
